Self-esteem

As a teenage girl, I’m pretty self-conscious about my appearance, especially when I’m around other teenage girls who I feel, look better than I do. I know I’m not the only girl in America who feels this way either.  According to Oprah.com, 76.2% of teen-agers are self-conscious or dissatisfied with their appearance. Over 70% of 15 to 17 year old girls avoid going to school or other public places when they are worried about their looks. And according to dosomething.org an astounding 75% of these girls have engaged in negative activities such as self-harm, bullying, disordered eating, or abuse alcohol and drugs.

Young women feel they have to be perfect because that’s what society says; you have to wear a certain brand of clothing and wear your hair and make-up a certain way and you have to be so tall and you have to have the right amount of skin showing off and you have to have a certain facial structure, the list is never ending. Some girls believe that they have to be what society tells them to be.

Through all of this crap society tells us to be we get lost in what we should be and not in what we want to be; we lose our own self-worth and aren’t even catering to our own needs anymore, society has made us mind-less, soul-less clones. We forget that we are part of society and that we do in fact have a voice. We get so lost in society’s standard of beauty that we forget who we are, you’ve forgotten who you are. That’s a really scary thought, to know that you have no idea who you even are anymore.

It’s so sad that we don’t even realize what we’re doing to ourselves, or what we’re doing to our families, or our society. By obeying the standards of beauty society has set for us we’re just feeding the fire. It’s even sadder to think that we’re afraid to be who we are, but in all honesty we are afraid, I’m afraid.

Self-confidence isn’t about going with the flow, it’s about stepping out and being your own person, even if you’re scared. It’s about loving who you are, not what society wants you to be. Yeah, it’s hard, you don’t want to be judged and ridiculed, but isn’t it worth it if you know who you are? If you’re just going with the flow and not catering your own personal needs you’re just judging and ridiculing yourself. Now think, really think, who are you? Be who you want to be and not who you’re told to be.

Pain

In some way or another, we’ve all been in pain, whether it be physical or emotional, pain is pain. Yet for some reason, people still debate over which is worse. I agree that there is a difference between physical and emotional pain. But that doesn’t at all mean that one is more severe than the other. Honestly it just depends on the circumstance and the circumstance can vary greatly.

Physical pain is easier to see and there for, easier to understand. For example if someone broke their leg, you would have sympathy for them because you’ve probably broken a bone before, and even if you haven’t, you can still comprehend the amount of pain they must be in. over time this pain goes away, sometimes it takes a while but it does go away and you go back to feeling like brand new. You can go right back to your sport or job with little to no hesitation at all, and that’s good! Everything goes back to the way it was, and you get to go right back to what you love to do. It’s simple.

Emotional pain is very different from physical pain, a heart break is nothing compared to a broken bone, but sometimes that heart break can last longer than a cast on your arm or leg; sometimes that heart break turns into depression. But that topic is for a later date. Emotional pain is always in the same places, your heart, and for some people it doesn’t take a lot to make their heart break. Not everyone can understand the emotional pain you’re in because everybody can handle different amounts of pain, to you it may look like a little scratch but to them it could be a broken bone you know? You just can’t tell how much it actually hurts that person, and even if you could tell what would you say to them? It’s so hard to fell sympathetic towards people who are feeling this emotional pain inside because you can’t see it.

I fell there are some similarities between the two though. Like you can still go to school and work with physical and emotional pain, it might be difficult but it can be done. Another similarity is death, although it’s unlikely for you to die from emotional pain, you can end up dying. I know that’s a scary thought, but it’s the unfortunate truth. Believe what you will about physical and emotional pain and believe what you will about death.

Calm Down

On the weekends, I work at a little place called DonutLand. One morning a couple came in and were deciding on donuts, I overheard the woman say something about slivered almond, so I asked, ‘would you like some of those ma’am?’ she responded in a very sharp tone, with, ‘can we have a conversation without you interrupting? Thanks.’ I quickly apologized and remained quiet until I was sure they were talking to me.

I’m not a very emotional person, but when people that I don’t even know; that I’m trying to help, yell at me, I get pretty frazzled. My co-workers and everyone else that has a job serving people, probably feel the same way. I don’t really want to be yelled at before it’s even 8 o’clock in the morning and especially by someone I don’t know. I’m a teenage girl getting up every morning to work, either at school or at my job serving people with a smile. I don’t need sympathy or pity, just for you to treat me the way you would like to be treated. That is the golden rule after all isn’t it?

Food For Thought

For my A.P. language and composition class, we have to write a blog, hence this blog. We also have to have a blog focus, and as of right now, my topic has changed. My topic will now be ‘Food For Thought’. So if you scroll down past this post, my posts will be about high school.

            I know it might be confusing but please don’t freak out in the comments. I will most likely incorporate some high school and teenage aspects into my later posts. Something I might be talking about is stuff like self-harm, bullying, homework, and all the other beautiful things the world has to offer, she said sarcastically.

            Food For Thought, to me, isn’t a very positive subject. So I apologize in advanced if anything on here makes you feel any kind of negative emotions, but these things can’t be left unsaid any longer.

It’s a fair warning.

Lazy

Lazy- adjective,

1)      Averse or disinclined to work, activity, or exertion; indolent

2)      Causing idleness or indolence

3)      Slow-moving; sluggish

4)      High school students

 

We’ve all been called lazy; by our teachers, our family members, or even our friends. High school students are known for being lazy. Everyone says teen agers are lazy. This doesn’t make sense to me, mainly because, as high school students, we- for the most part- have jobs on top of school and homework. So naturally when we school or our part-time job at McDonalds, we just want to relax for a bit.

 

We go to school five days a week for seven hours each day. That’s basically a full time job! If you didn’t get paid for the job you do would you want to do it? Chances are you would say no. no one wants to do work, especially if you’re not getting paid for it.

 

I understand that our education is important. I get that we need to work hard now in order to do well in the future. I also think its ok to be a little bit lazy sometimes. We can’t go and go and go all the time. The human body just isn’t made to do that. Maybe we do over sleep, but is that because we’re lazy, or is it because we stayed up until midnight doing our homework?

Theft

All throughout our lives we see things we want, but for some of us just wanting these items means you have to have them. Being in a school with over 1800 students, there are a lot of different personality traits. Some of which include sticky fingers.

            I know a girl who recently got her phone stolen while eating lunch. But why would someone ever steal a phone? It can be traced or shut off so you wouldn’t have any use for it anyways. I guess you could always sell it but what if they find out it was stolen? There are just so many flaws in this plan, so many ‘what if’s’. I really don’t understand why people steal though. You’re in high school so you can probably get a job and get your own money and expensive items. Don’t you have moral standards anyways? Have you ever thought ‘would I like it if someone stole my hard earned money or connection to the outside world?

            You’re not only stealing someone’s phone or money, you’re also stealing someone’s trust, someone’s faith in humanity and sometimes even in themselves. I’ve never had anything stolen from me but if I did I would have blamed myself for being so careless and stupid when it really was you being careless and stupid.

            So next time you want to take that girls phone or take the rich boys money. Think. Think about what you’re really doing. Think about what you’re doing to them; think about people stealing you’re phone or money; your security. Now think. Is that really worth it?

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Just a Little Advice

Today, the sophomores of Kennedy are taking the plan test which is basically a practice ACT to find out how you would do if you took the ACT right now. Last year at this time I was taking the plan test. I kept over hearing people talk about how “it’s so stupid to take this test” and “oh I’m not going to even try.” I thought it was kind of pointless too but I tried my best anyway. The other day I was sitting down with my counselor talking about college and she brought up the plan test. She said it kind of predicts how I’ll do on the ACT or SAT and apparently my score was above average. I wouldn’t have even known that had I not tried and neither would my counselor.

            What I’m trying to say is, most kids think it’s dumb because as sophomores you’re not really looking at college or anything yet. But as juniors you have to look at colleges and start planning for your future. That’s a lot of pressure and responsibility, sophomores don’t know how crucial this plan test is yet. It’s not their fault either. They’re still just babies compared to the rest of us.

A very wise women once told me that you change from the time you turn 16 to the time you turn 17 or maybe a little bit after that, you become more mature, more understanding of your surroundings and more accepting. This is one of the truest things I’ve ever heard. From birthday to birthday we don’t feel older, but now I feel older. I feel more mature, I feel 17. I know this is going to sound weird, but kids don’t understand that they just want to be cool and say “oh yeah the test is dumb I’m so cool.” I didn’t realize until now that we were the ones being dumb.

So I’m going to end this with a word of advice to the sophomores. Don’t be dumb. It may not seem important now, but you have to take this stuff at least a little bit seriously. It’s ok to have fun, but be serious when it comes to your future because your actions in the past will always catch up with you. You’ll thank me later. ;)

 

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Know the Signs

Recently, I’ve been talking to a girl who gets bullied pretty badly in school. I was texting her the other day and asked her what she was doing. She responded with a simple one word answer, writing. Writing what? I ask generally curious, I enjoy writing as well. Her response shocked me. I expected ‘oh just something for school.’ But she said ‘A suicide note.’ This girl is 14, and she is so willing to take her life or hurt herself because she gets bullied so badly. But why? Why does this poor girl get bullied? Because she knows who she is. She knows she’s a lesbian. And people use that against her.

She isn’t the only one though. She isn’t the only poor helpless soul getting shunned for being who she is, and that’s a problem. One person getting picked on, let alone the hundreds upon thousands of girls and boys who get ridiculed because of who they are. Now I want you to ask yourself. Are you guilty? Are you guilty of making these people feel worthless? Were you even aware what you were doing? Probably not. But now you will be, here are some signs that someone is considering giving up on everything; giving up on themselves.

One sure sign that someone is considering this is if their giving away (or throwing away) their possessions. I’m not just talking about giving their old clothes to charity, I’m talking about them giving away things they love and adore to people they love and adore. Like giving away their collection of bottle caps to their little siblings. They spent a lot of time with these objects and the people they love know how important these things are to them.  Before you confront them though, you should probably look for other sings.

Something else you should look for is drastic change, like if this girl or boy were to cut their hair or dye it. Maybe they stopped wearing makeup, maybe they started wearing makeup. It doesn’t matter what it is, there are a lot of possibilities. But if something does change, you’ll notice; everyone will notice. After all that’s what they want. They want someone to notice them. Maybe even a simple compliment would be enough to stop them.  Maybe it wouldn’t. But it doesn’t hurt to try.

Sometimes these people have what they call ‘suicide plans’ which basically means they have a plan to commit suicide. They know how, they know where, and they know when. Some things they might say are “if something ever happens to me I want you to know this” or “don’t worry I won’t bother you for long” obviously this is something that should concerning anyways, but if you just brushed it off as nothing, well here you go. It’s not nothing.

I think the most helpful hint in this situation would be the verbal hints. It’s also one of the first signs, this means they still have hope for themselves, hope that someone will help them. These include phrases like “I wish I could just die” or “I’m thinking or committing suicide”. Of course these are the most helpful because they’re admitting it, they’re admitting they want to die, they’re crying for help. Begging for it even.

The last sign I will share with you today is simple. They take risks, like walking in front of traffic perhaps. This indicates that they don’t care if they die or not. If it’s an accident, cool, because if it’s an ‘accident’ they don’t have to think too much about it. They don’t have to think about who it’s affecting because they didn’t have to take their own life, someone took it for them. Everyone will think it was simply an accident. They don’t want people to know what really happened; they don’t want to admit it not even to themselves.

Of course these aren’t all the signs someone is considering something crucial like this. If you know someone who might be suicidal please talk to them, let them know you’re there for them. This might be the turning point for them. You might be able to save a life.

For more signs of suicide or suicide help, please visit: http://www.teensuicide.us/articles2.html

 

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Nothing lasts forever

Relationships. Throughout high school, the majority of us end up having one. As teenagers, we all want to fit in, and relationships let us do that. It’s the ‘cool’ thing to do. Dating also gives you the opportunity to find out more about yourself; like what characteristics you like and don’t like in people and it also show you characteristics you never knew you had. And that, is very interesting.

                We’ve all heard the saying “nothing lasts forever” this statement applies to many things, especially high school relationships. This might be because we always get into relationships for the sake of just being in a relationship. To show we’re not alone. To show that someone ‘excepts’ us. But this isn’t always true because at the beginning of a relationship we date that person because of their looks and then find out we don’t really like their personality. Another reason relationships don’t last in high school is because we have so many options. That probably sounds bad but it’s true. Even if you don’t think it is, trust me, it is. Then once we find someone else we like we just move on.

                High school relationships, and all relationships, take a toll on your friendships, sometimes, leaving you to choose between your friendship and you relationship. Unfortunately this always weakens one relationship. Possibly even ending it. And it always just so happens to be your relationship with the person you’re dating. Sisters before mister’s right? Drugs, alcohol and sex also have a very big effect on relationships. These things dramatize your relationship more than it needs to be. But I’ll save this topic for a later date.

                On the bright side, some high school relationships do last. Even if it is only about 5%, it still proves that something’s do, indeed, last forever. 

Freshman Rant

 

The other day, my class went to a preview of the school play. Before the scene started some under classman decided to play ‘who can get the last clap’. Of course this provoked others around me; sophomores where yelling “shut up!” seniors whispered “really?” and “how immature”. Seeing this response from the sophomores and seniors, I knew it had to be the freshman playing that game.

            I guess my question is why? Why do the freshman have to be so obnoxious? Do they not care if they get beat up? Do they even know how annoying their being? Most of all do they know how disrespectful their being?

            You’re getting out of class to watch a play preview. Not only that, but the actors have been preparing for so long. Making everything perfect. Memorizing the script. Becoming the character. And you have the nerve, as freshman, to play the last clap game while the director is beginning to talk?

            You’re freshman. You’re not ‘the top dogs’ anymore. You’re at the bottom of the food chain. Do you not understand that? Why is it so hard to sit down and watch a play preview for what? 20 minutes? 30 at most. And you sit here and just clap you’re little hands hoping people will think you’re funny. Well I can tell by the response from the people around you, and my opinion, you’re not ‘cool’.

            Another thing freshman do is walk to close to people or push people in the hallway. You don’t need to be standing so close to someone that you repeatedly step on the back of their feet. I have blisters from this! And seriously stop pushing people. You have plenty of time to get to your class. There is no need to push people into other people. I can see brushing past someone who isn’t moving and lightly apologizing or saying excuse me. Is that really so hard? Is you’re tiny body filled with so much rage that you have to push an upperclassmen? Do you want to get beat up?

            I blame the freshman’s lack of common sense but also the lack of helpful older siblings to guide them through the do’s and don’ts of the high school community.

 

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Healthy?

Last year, when the Healthy Kids Act started, we no longer had desert at our school and we also had to start using heart rate monitors in gym.  Heart rate monitors are devices that you put underneath your shirt by your heart to see how many beats per minute your heart gets. This data is collected and displayed on a watch. For gym we have to get 30 minute per gym period with a heart rate over 140.This of course raised a lot of complaints.

                At the beginning of all this I, myself had some complaints, but for no really good reason besides the fact that we didn’t get to have cookie dough once or so a week.  We mostly had complaints about the heart rate monitors. And now that I think about it, there are mostly good things about the heart rate monitors and not having cookie dough.

                On the positive side of all this we are, in fact, getting healthier. Especially with the heart rate monitors. We may not be able to see it right away but there are results. Maybe it’s not getting winded when you go up the stairs or losing .5 pounds.  And not eating cookie dough and other deserts means eating more fruits and vegetables. This has fewer calories and more of ‘the good stuff’ like vitamins and minerals.

                On the bad side, sometimes the heart rate monitors don’t work. Maybe because they have low batteries or you are already in shape. But even if you are in shape you have to work just as hard as or even harder than those who do get winded by just walking up the stairs. But I guess that how it has to be. We can complain all we want but that isn’t going to raise our heart rate.

The Art of Procrastination

Sometimes, when we have things to do like, oh I don’t know, write an essay for a blog or study for a test, we find ourselves putting it off until the last minute.

                This applies to everyone, but mostly high school students. But why is that? Why do we always put things off until the last minute? Because we’re lazy? Is it because we have better things to do? Or is there a deeper meaning?

                (http://greatist.com/happiness/how-not-to-procrastinate-reason-procrastination)

                While doing this essay last minute, I read an article called ‘The Real Reason We Procrastinate’ this article states that we procrastinate because doing the task will cause a certain amount of pain. This makes sense, no one wants to be in pain. They use the word ‘pain’ in a very broad way, meaning pain can be fear or shame and not just physical, mental, or emotional pain.

                The article goes on to say “without realizing it, most of us instinctively retreat to a comfort zone and do our best to never leave it.” Time does not procrastinate, so if we stay inside our ‘comfort zone’ opportunities and good grades fly out the window. After that the article says that eventually, this pain turns into power. With homework, I don’t believe that at all. Mainly because it’s Sunday night and I still have another essay to write. I do, however, think you can make things like homework and doing the laundry a bit more enjoyable. Even if it’s just turning on some up-beat music or rewarding yourself with M&M’s when you’ve finished your task.

                Another way to make things more enjoyable is to take a break every once in a while. If we don’t take a break sometimes we will never want to do things we have to do. Leaving those tasks undone and you unmotivated.  

Finding Myself

 

Usually, when someone asks me who I am, I simply respond with ‘I’m Megan. And you are?’ or ‘I’m Megan, we’ve gone to school together since the 6^th grade?’ but when someone says no WHO are you? What makes you, you? I just stand there, open mouth thinking ‘who am I?’ because I honestly don’t know who I am. I just am. You know? I can’t explain who I am because I view myself differently than everyone else. For example the girl I sit next to in one of my classes. She hates me. She might tell you that I am a… well, you know. My grandparents would tell you that I’m a nice young lady who is funny and very bright. But my friends might say ‘Megan? Yeah she’s cool’ but I guess this is the essay were I tell you about me. However, instead of telling you my favorite color is orange and my favorite food is watermelon. I will tell you a story giving you a glimpse of who I am.

            Now the question is, what story? Something that shaped me… something that made me who I am… Got it! I’ll tell you about my best friend. Kirsten.

            As a preschooler, my parents had to meet with my teacher towards the end of my preschool career. Not because I was a bad kid and bite someone, but because my teacher thought I needed to go to alternative kindergarten, which is basically another year of preschool before kindergarten. The first day I went, I was scared. I remember getting on the bus, my little head barley tall enough to be seen from the windows outside. I sat alone at the front of the bus.

            Later that same day we had ‘play time’ where we stayed inside and played with the little kitchen set or blocks in the classroom. I remember approaching a small round table perfect for my size. The table was decorated with a red and white checkered table cloth and fake food. This table was intriguing to me and a little blond girl named Kirsten. Quickly she became my best friend. When we got on the bus that afternoon, I no longer had to sit alone. Kirsten now sat right beside me.

            At the end of the year I moved, and was going to start a new school without Kirsten. Once again I was scared and thought I would have a hard time making friends. When I got to the open house to meet my teacher, I saw the little blond girl walking towards me. I was so happy to see her. Our parents started talking and we found out we only lived a block away from each other. Hearing that made our tiny brains go crazy with excitement. I could tell by looking at her excited face that this was the start of a long friendship.

           

            I’m now a junior in high school. Kirsten and I no longer live a block away from each other, and we don’t have any classes together. But we’re still the best of friends. I find that so amazing because it’s been 12 years… 12 years, even through high school, where friendships come to die. 12 years our friendship has lasted and 12 more years are to come. And honestly, at the end of the day that’s all that really matters, friendship, and I’m so glad I have someone like her to call my best friend. So thank you Kirsten. You’ve helped me find who I am. And that’s the best thing anyone can do for some one.